Mrs. Moneybags: Third Elimination

 After the day at Zenobia's pride event, the group gathers in the office of The Point. 

Rayshawn: Well, ladies, it's time.  Marty and I have made our decision.  

Rayshawn: Doreen, you're this week's high score.  Fives from both of us.  You and yours are very compatible with the Lucas men.  That brings your total to 27. 

Doreen (claps her hands): I'm so glad! 

Rayshawn: Gwen, I gave you a three and Marty gave you a four.  We liked your family, but frankly, we just liked the Carsons better.  Your total is also 27.

Gwen: I'm not complaining.  I figured Doreen would take this one, with Tommy existing and all. 

Rayshawn: Sally, I'm sorry to say that you scored lowest this time.  One point from each of us.  From what you tell us of your family, it doesn't seem as if they'd be compatible with us at all.  We don't do gender roles and we certainly don't cast out people for things beyond their control. 

Sally: Nobody cast me out.  I chose to be here and do this. 

Rayshawn: You clearly feel that you had no better option.  Your total is sixteen. 

Rayshawn: Seven, you get four points form me and three from Marty.  From what you tell us, your family seems like our kind of people.  Your total is 21. 

Seven: Excellent. 

Rayshawn: Esperanza, you score two from each of us, despite the fact that we did find your mothers to be good people, bringing your total to thirteen.  You're going home.  

Esperanza: Yeah, I figured. 

Rayshawn: A parting gift of three thousand dollars.  No airfare home, since you live here in Barbieville.  

Esperanza: It's been quite an experience.  Thanks for the consideration.  (shakes hands and leaves)

Rayshawn:  Next week, we're relaxing more.  Just pulling our shifts in the front office, hanging around The Point, and at the end of the week....  (gestures to Nakoma)

Nakoma: For those of you who don't know me, I'm Nakoma Smith, one of the owners of Witch's Cove.  On Friday, we've reserved admission tickets for all of you.  Nothing like the pleasant exhaustion from a day at the amusement park to bring... 

Sally: I can't go to an amusement park!  With my health issues, I won't be able to ride anything!

Seven: There's lots to do besides ride.  Midway games, eating, shopping... even just people watching.

Gwen: Yeah, I can't ride much because of my back, but it's still a fun day. 

Doreen: See there?  Gwen can stay with you while we ride the things you can't.  

Sally: No, thank you.  (To Nakoma) I respectfully decline your offer.  I'll just stay here at the motel while they go. 

Nakoma: I did not expect that.  

Rayshawn: It's cool.  We'll just need one ticket less.  

Charlotte: Seriously?  You should make her go!  It's part of the deal! 

Rayshawn: I'm not in the habit of making people do things they don't want to.  (To Nakoma) Don't worry, you'll still get your money's worth in free advertising.  

Mrs. Moneybags At Pride

 Rayshawn hosts a day at the privately funded Pride Event, held for the second year by Zenobia Malfoy.  This gives him a chance to get acquainted with the families of his prospective brides... at least, the ones with family in town.  Doreen's goes first.

Tommy: It will be so cool if we end up being stepbrothers!  Do you think your dad would adopt us?  Can you adopt grownups? 

Marty: I'd get two brothers and a sister just like that - BAM.   

Tommy: And Peeta.  Someday he's gonna be a brother in law.  Not sure about Jimin, he's pretty new. 

Rayshawn: If your mom wins this thing, would any of you be interested in going to work at The Point?  She says she intends to continue to teach, but her weekends and summers are negotiable. 

Bonnie: Absolutely not.  I have a career at the Probation Office.  

Ken: I don't see why not, if it doesn't get in the way of school.  I plan to be a teacher like Mom.  

Peeta: Does that offer include in-laws?  (To Doreen)  Yes, we're finally getting around to planning a wedding.  

*****

Next, he meets Gwen's sister and niece.

Rallee: Before you ask... no, I will not work at The Point.  I busted my butt to be Superintendent of Schools and plan to stay on track to better education for as many kids as possible.  

Gwen: She's gonna be Secretary of Education someday, just watch.  If not President.  

Rallee: President?  (laughs) Can you imagine?

Rayshawn: Actually, I can.  Gwen speaks very highly of you, and so does almost everyone else in this town.  

Rallee: Well, I speak just as highly of her.  Gwen's been my rock, all my life.   

Marty: So you might be my cousin soon.  I don't know what to do with a cousin. 

Luna: Neither do I!  (both laugh) It's always just been the three of us, ever since I can remember.  My grandparents died when I was a baby and my dad ran off before I was born.  

****

After lunch, it's time for the Hernandez clan. Charlotte shows up with them, having taken Esperanza under her wing.

Daisy: We wouldn't come to work for you, no.  Bertie is an anchor on the local news and I'm happy at the grocery store.  Besides, we wouldn't want to meddle in Esper's marriage.  

Rayshawn: That's not a bad policy, generally speaking.  My first marriage was a disaster because meddling is all her family did.  They're having fits now because I kept Marty for the summer, said I should just do this on my own and Marty would have to live with my choice. 

Bertie: As unorthodox as this is, I applaud your including the boy.  He's going to have to live with the woman, he should have some say in the matter.  

*****

Rayshawn takes Esperanza on a carriage ride, as he's done with each lady after meeting the family.  Charlotte's sister finds her sitting alone after Bertie and Daisy leave.

Charlotte: Why are you carrying that child?  Her legs work.

Batgirl: She's exhausted.  If I stood her up right now, she'd just crumble to the ground.

Jenny: Wainbow Day makes me sweepy. 

Batgirl: I saw the camera crew following the carriage.  Mace didn't look happy about it.  

Charlotte: I really don't understand Rayshawn's priorities.  For one thing, why is Martin getting a vote?  He's a child!  And there's been no romancing of the women... it's almost like he's interviewing them for a job. 

Batgirl: Well, I imagine it's hard to romance anyone with a camera crew over your shoulder.  And in a sense, courtship is a job interview.  If Joe hadn't met my requirements for a husband, I wouldn't be with him now. 

Charlotte: You and I have very different requirements for a husband, clearly.  

******

Rayshawn joins Charlotte before his time with Sally and Seven.

Rayshawn: What do you think?  

Charlotte: I'm still stuck on Rallee Jones as a government figure.  With her half-shaved head and bastard daughter?  Seriously? 

Rayshawn: You have a bastard of your own, if memory serves. 

Charlotte: I do not!  Billy adopted Christopher! 

Rayshawn: What about the Carsons?  The only one of them unwilling to help was Bonnie, and she had good reason. Marty's already friends with Tommy, too.

Charlotte:  Dullest family ever.  And I don't even think those boys are really gay - they certainly don't act like it. Holding hands... big deal.

Rayshawn: Well, your pet's mothers weren't exactly slobbering all over each other, and none of them want to work at The Point.  Not even Esperanza - she thinks she's going to be a star.  (melodramatic gesture) I'm not even sure how that girl came from Bertie and Daisy, honestly, they're so grounded.

*****

Since neither of the two remaining ladies have family nearby to meet, Rayshawn takes each of them on an extra long carriage ride and discuss the matter.

Marty: Hey, look, Sally, we match! 

Sally: Yes, we do.  (To Rayshawn) Honestly, I don't understand.  You allow him to play with girl toys and wear girl clothes and now we're at a Pride Rally.  Is he gay?  Do you want him to be? 

Rayshawn: Do you have a problem with gays?  

Sally: It's just not natural.  If men were intended to be with men, children would result.  It's like a cat mating with a dog or something. 

Marty: Boys and girls do lots of stuff that don't make babies.  (starts to list them, beginning with condoms, but Rayshawn hushes him)  So, Sally... do you come from a big family? 

Sally: I do.  We all work with livestock, in some form.  None of them would be willing to confine themselves to living or working in town like this, but I can't do that anymore and must find something! 

Rayshawn: None of your family can take you in? 

Sally: No one has room for dead weight. Why, I can't even work as a flag girl at the rodeo anymore, not with my face disfigured.  My only option is to find a husband who doesn't mind that. I'm a great cook.  I'll make a good wife. 

******

Seven's turn!

As they start out, Tierra runs over.

Tierra: Thank you so much, Rayshawn!  I got the best job from your friend!  (to Seven)  She owns an amusement park and wanted to bring in costumed characters, maybe a little show or two... and I'm totally in charge of that!  

Rayshawn: I hoped you could work with them.  Not exactly Broadway, but it pays good and you can keep your dignity. 

Tierra: Yes! Some women like (glances at Marty) exotic dancing, but not me.  The theater I was interning at got mad when I said I was staying in Barbieville, but I gotta do what I gotta do! 

Seven: I'm so happy for her!  And you - a lot of men would've just rejected her and shipped her off. 

Rayshawn: I rejected her as a wife, not as a person.  Remember, I did ship off Reggie V.

Marty: She was so stuck up, she probably thinks she rejected you. 

Seven:  Well, I guess you want to hear about my family, since that's today's focus.  I've got 3 siblings. We've all got diplomas, but there was no money for college. We all went right to work.  Some of us even worked before graduating.  We're all single, no kids. 

Rayshawn: What about your parents? 

Seven: Nasty divorce, a long time ago.  None of us have much to do with either of them, honestly, because it's constant rant about how horrible the other parent is.  Just toxic. 

Marty: Do you like gay people? 

Seven: I would have refused to come here today if I had a problem with anyone represented by this festival.  (glances at Rayshawn) Is that part of today's test? 

Rayshawn:  It wasn't originally.  I made the mistake of assuming anyone who participated in something like this was pretty open-minded.   

Taylor Tells The Family

After receiving an alarming call, Rose-Grace combines errands with tracking down her husband.

Rose-Grace:  There you are!  Daisy told me you were in HBAD! 

Pike:  I was, last she knew.  What's going on?

Fred: Step Mommy's real upset.  Tell her it's okay, Daddy. 

Rose-Grace: I just got a call from the Medical Social Worker.  It seems Stacie's convinced herself Taylor is dying.  I know we told Taylor it could wait until she was ready to tell the family, but... 

Pike:  Stacie never really got over your mom's death.  (Significant glance toward Fred)  And this might be too complex for some members of the family. 

Fred: I told Stacie it was big people stuff.  She don't never listen to me. 

*****

That evening.... 

Taylor:  What the hell?!  Does she think we're a bunch of liars?! 

Pike: We kind of set a precedent for what she thinks is going on, given how we failed to properly explain Grammy's illness. 

Taylor: Well, I'm not happy, but I guess we don't have a lot of choice at this point.  Can't have Stacie accidentally starting rumors. 

Rose-Grace:  I'll spread the word.  Family meeting tonight, after the little ones go to bed.  Might as well tell everyone at once.  And I'm sorry we have to rush this on you. 

Taylor: Apology accepted.  I almost have my head wrapped around it, anyway, so... 

Taylor: I... When my appendix burst, the surgeons found out that I don't have internal female guts.  Where my ovaries should be, I have testicles. It's called Androgen Insensitivity Syndrome.  (Looks directly at Stacie)  I can't have babies, that's all it really means.  I am not dying. 

Lee:  Wait, what?  

McG:  I'll explain when we get home, dear.  No need to prolong Taylor's discomfort. 

Finnick: Isn't that really rare? 

Taylor: Yes, it is.  And I'd appreciate it if y'all are careful who you talk to about this.  I'm not ashamed or anything, but it's a private matter.  I really don't want it getting all over town. 

Morgan: People can be very cruel, even if they mean well.   I don't blame you for wanting to keep this quiet... especially in high school! 

Mace: That doesn't make any sense... I changed your diapers, you're a girl.  

Tanner: The only boy parts she has are inside, Grandpa.  It's not like the other kinds of Intersex, where the problem's obvious.  

Nikki: Is that in my sex ed book?  Or do we not cover that til a higher grade?

Stacie:  You're not dying?!  Really and truly?! (Runs across the room and hugs Taylor.)