New Folks, Old Families

 In a small park near Doll County Airport, three new arrivals claim a bench.

Oksana:  I bet my new daddies get here before your new mommies do.  

Vash: No way!  Your new mommies are old and everybody knows old people drive slow. 

Oksana: Mr. Picard, do you think it's yukky to have two mommies or two daddies?  That man on the airplane said it is.

JL: I'm sure it's none of my business.  I was asked by the agency to escort you here, since we were all coming to the same place.  I was not asked to judge anyone's morals.  

Vash: Are you calling Miss Tuesday to tell her we made it?  

JL: Yes.  Please play quietly while I do so. 

Vash: We gots to be quiet anyway because Jraff and Sleepy are having a nap.  

JL (on phone): We've arrived safely.  The families are stuck in traffic behind an accident, but they are on the way.  I will stay with the children as promised.  (Listens for a moment.)  I did have to suggest to a homophobe that he write to the government instead of frightening small children, but otherwise there's been no problem.  

JL reads up on his new hometown while the girls play, occasionally mentioning something that might interest them, until the first set of parents arrives.  Peeta handles the legalities with JL while Ken plops onto the ground beside the children.

Oksana: I told her that my daddies would beat her mommies here.  Cause they're old and you aren't.

Ken: We know the roads because we grew up here and they just moved here. Bertie and Daisy ain't so old.  Older than us, but younger than my mom.  

Vash: You know my new mommies?  Do you know my new sister, too?  (pronouncing carefully) Es-per-on-za.

Ken: Barbieville's a small town.  Pretty much everyone knows everyone.   

JL snaps a photo for the agency before releasing Oksana to their custody.  (Probably for promotional and legal purposes, but he didn't ask.)  

Oksana:  Bye-bye, Vash.  See you at school, I guess! 

Vash:  I hope we get a nice teacher.  

Peeta: She's very nice.  (elbows Ken.)  We like her a lot. 

Oksana: Oh, yeah!  I forgot, Vash, my new Grandma is gonna be our teacher!  

Vash:  That's almost as neat-o as one of my mommies being the news lady! 

Ken (points toward parking lot):  There's Vash's mommies, in that white car.  We'll point them in the right direction.

Since JL has the camera ready, The Hernandez family poses before getting down to business. 

Daisy:  We really appreciate your taking care of Vash for her trip.  It was very nice of you. 

JL: It seemed the most logical course.  A sister agency had, after all, helped me find my home here and therefore knew I was safe for them to travel with.  No need to burden airline staff with the responsibility of two excited adoptees.

Bertie: A lot of people would have refused to do it.  Are you waiting for someone to pick you up?  We could give you a ride if you don't mind squishing a bit.

JL: I was planning to call a cab, but I'd be very happy to accept a ride.  

Esperanza: So.  You're my new sister. 

Vash: Yes.  I had a big sister before, but she got dead like my old mommy and daddy.  It made me sad and scared. Some nice people helped me come here to be safe. 

Esperanza: Nowhere is safe, kid.  Some places are just safer than others, and they're usually boring.  Are you friends with that other girl?  The one Ken and Peeta adopted?  

Vash: We was at the orphan house together.  I'm happy we got adopted to the same town so we can still play together.  

Mrs. Moneybags At Pride

 Rayshawn hosts a day at the privately funded Pride Event, held for the second year by Zenobia Malfoy.  This gives him a chance to get acquainted with the families of his prospective brides... at least, the ones with family in town.  Doreen's goes first.

Tommy: It will be so cool if we end up being stepbrothers!  Do you think your dad would adopt us?  Can you adopt grownups? 

Marty: I'd get two brothers and a sister just like that - BAM.   

Tommy: And Peeta.  Someday he's gonna be a brother in law.  Not sure about Jimin, he's pretty new. 

Rayshawn: If your mom wins this thing, would any of you be interested in going to work at The Point?  She says she intends to continue to teach, but her weekends and summers are negotiable. 

Bonnie: Absolutely not.  I have a career at the Probation Office.  

Ken: I don't see why not, if it doesn't get in the way of school.  I plan to be a teacher like Mom.  

Peeta: Does that offer include in-laws?  (To Doreen)  Yes, we're finally getting around to planning a wedding.  

*****

Next, he meets Gwen's sister and niece.

Rallee: Before you ask... no, I will not work at The Point.  I busted my butt to be Superintendent of Schools and plan to stay on track to better education for as many kids as possible.  

Gwen: She's gonna be Secretary of Education someday, just watch.  If not President.  

Rallee: President?  (laughs) Can you imagine?

Rayshawn: Actually, I can.  Gwen speaks very highly of you, and so does almost everyone else in this town.  

Rallee: Well, I speak just as highly of her.  Gwen's been my rock, all my life.   

Marty: So you might be my cousin soon.  I don't know what to do with a cousin. 

Luna: Neither do I!  (both laugh) It's always just been the three of us, ever since I can remember.  My grandparents died when I was a baby and my dad ran off before I was born.  

****

After lunch, it's time for the Hernandez clan. Charlotte shows up with them, having taken Esperanza under her wing.

Daisy: We wouldn't come to work for you, no.  Bertie is an anchor on the local news and I'm happy at the grocery store.  Besides, we wouldn't want to meddle in Esper's marriage.  

Rayshawn: That's not a bad policy, generally speaking.  My first marriage was a disaster because meddling is all her family did.  They're having fits now because I kept Marty for the summer, said I should just do this on my own and Marty would have to live with my choice. 

Bertie: As unorthodox as this is, I applaud your including the boy.  He's going to have to live with the woman, he should have some say in the matter.  

*****

Rayshawn takes Esperanza on a carriage ride, as he's done with each lady after meeting the family.  Charlotte's sister finds her sitting alone after Bertie and Daisy leave.

Charlotte: Why are you carrying that child?  Her legs work.

Batgirl: She's exhausted.  If I stood her up right now, she'd just crumble to the ground.

Jenny: Wainbow Day makes me sweepy. 

Batgirl: I saw the camera crew following the carriage.  Mace didn't look happy about it.  

Charlotte: I really don't understand Rayshawn's priorities.  For one thing, why is Martin getting a vote?  He's a child!  And there's been no romancing of the women... it's almost like he's interviewing them for a job. 

Batgirl: Well, I imagine it's hard to romance anyone with a camera crew over your shoulder.  And in a sense, courtship is a job interview.  If Joe hadn't met my requirements for a husband, I wouldn't be with him now. 

Charlotte: You and I have very different requirements for a husband, clearly.  

******

Rayshawn joins Charlotte before his time with Sally and Seven.

Rayshawn: What do you think?  

Charlotte: I'm still stuck on Rallee Jones as a government figure.  With her half-shaved head and bastard daughter?  Seriously? 

Rayshawn: You have a bastard of your own, if memory serves. 

Charlotte: I do not!  Billy adopted Christopher! 

Rayshawn: What about the Carsons?  The only one of them unwilling to help was Bonnie, and she had good reason. Marty's already friends with Tommy, too.

Charlotte:  Dullest family ever.  And I don't even think those boys are really gay - they certainly don't act like it. Holding hands... big deal.

Rayshawn: Well, your pet's mothers weren't exactly slobbering all over each other, and none of them want to work at The Point.  Not even Esperanza - she thinks she's going to be a star.  (melodramatic gesture) I'm not even sure how that girl came from Bertie and Daisy, honestly, they're so grounded.

*****

Since neither of the two remaining ladies have family nearby to meet, Rayshawn takes each of them on an extra long carriage ride and discuss the matter.

Marty: Hey, look, Sally, we match! 

Sally: Yes, we do.  (To Rayshawn) Honestly, I don't understand.  You allow him to play with girl toys and wear girl clothes and now we're at a Pride Rally.  Is he gay?  Do you want him to be? 

Rayshawn: Do you have a problem with gays?  

Sally: It's just not natural.  If men were intended to be with men, children would result.  It's like a cat mating with a dog or something. 

Marty: Boys and girls do lots of stuff that don't make babies.  (starts to list them, beginning with condoms, but Rayshawn hushes him)  So, Sally... do you come from a big family? 

Sally: I do.  We all work with livestock, in some form.  None of them would be willing to confine themselves to living or working in town like this, but I can't do that anymore and must find something! 

Rayshawn: None of your family can take you in? 

Sally: No one has room for dead weight. Why, I can't even work as a flag girl at the rodeo anymore, not with my face disfigured.  My only option is to find a husband who doesn't mind that. I'm a great cook.  I'll make a good wife. 

******

Seven's turn!

As they start out, Tierra runs over.

Tierra: Thank you so much, Rayshawn!  I got the best job from your friend!  (to Seven)  She owns an amusement park and wanted to bring in costumed characters, maybe a little show or two... and I'm totally in charge of that!  

Rayshawn: I hoped you could work with them.  Not exactly Broadway, but it pays good and you can keep your dignity. 

Tierra: Yes! Some women like (glances at Marty) exotic dancing, but not me.  The theater I was interning at got mad when I said I was staying in Barbieville, but I gotta do what I gotta do! 

Seven: I'm so happy for her!  And you - a lot of men would've just rejected her and shipped her off. 

Rayshawn: I rejected her as a wife, not as a person.  Remember, I did ship off Reggie V.

Marty: She was so stuck up, she probably thinks she rejected you. 

Seven:  Well, I guess you want to hear about my family, since that's today's focus.  I've got 3 siblings. We've all got diplomas, but there was no money for college. We all went right to work.  Some of us even worked before graduating.  We're all single, no kids. 

Rayshawn: What about your parents? 

Seven: Nasty divorce, a long time ago.  None of us have much to do with either of them, honestly, because it's constant rant about how horrible the other parent is.  Just toxic. 

Marty: Do you like gay people? 

Seven: I would have refused to come here today if I had a problem with anyone represented by this festival.  (glances at Rayshawn) Is that part of today's test? 

Rayshawn:  It wasn't originally.  I made the mistake of assuming anyone who participated in something like this was pretty open-minded.   

Success!

Morning, on Muneca Lake Beach.   

Zenobia: Because the village of Barbieville stopped hosting Pride Events, it's been unfairly labeled.  Mayor Rose-Grace Pike has been accused of homophobia and transphobia, but nothing could be farther from the truth.  (laughs) The 1810 village charter contains the following:  "Private acts by adults, inflicting no harm upon others, shall not be governed by law.  If such is sin, each of us will answer a higher authority."  The simple fact of the matter is this: Behavior of celebrants at past events brought private acts into the streets.  Celebrants who chose to be more discrete were openly mocked.  (pause for effect) This event is being hosted by me, Zenobia Malfoy, as a private citizen.  It's not fancy because almost everyone participating has volunteered.  Love is love, the details don't matter, so let's not focus on them. 

Crowd cheers.  

Zenobia: We've got no parade, but a nice little festival.  Including live music by my band Sarcastic Fringehead, which starts as soon as I pass this microphone to the lovely Whitney Darling. 

*****

Later, down by the floodwall. 

Ken: Hey, your band is good!  

Tanner: Yeah, we do all right as long as some jackass isn't yelling "Free Bird" from the crowd. (To Peeta) What the hell is that? 

Peeta: We won these for Tommy at the arcade.  Cost us a good bit, but it was totally worth it. And by the way, that was his mom yelling Free Bird.  She laughed so hard when the entire band "freed their birds" at us I thought she was gonna hurt herself. 

Tanner (shrugs): We're gonna do another set later, but Whitney had to go to work, so it'll be when she gets back.   You guys more comfortable here?  No one telling you to act more gay?

Ken: Our matching outfits and holding hands doesn't seem to be upsetting anyone on either side of the fence.  I really wish people'd stop thinking all gay men are flamers.  

Tommy: Your dad looks more like people think a gay dude should than my brother does, and he's walking around with a pretty woman! Is that your mom?  Did she rainbow her hair just for today? 

Casey: You know Dad.  He ain't gonna let being straight keep him from looking fabulous.  And no, Mom's hair is always like that.  (to Stacie) If Angus is here, who is pulling the carriage?  

Stacie: Our new mare, Ka-Gae.  She's kinda scary looking, almost totally white and she's got the blackest eyes!  Really sweet, though.  Angus will get his turn later, when Ka-Gae is tired. 

Tommy: Hey, Mommy, did you meet Casey's mom and dad?  They're so cool. 

Doreen: Yes, I met Iris and Coby at teacher conferences.  Coby is one of Ken's college instructors, too. 

Coby: You kids can ride the carriage together, if it's okay with Doreen. (laughs when Tommy and Casey get excited)  I thought you'd like that, but y'all better behave for Mr. Windu. 

Speaking of the carriage rides, The Hernandez family is returning from a pleasant jaunt around town.  

Esperanza: This is the worst Pride Festival ever.  I keep waiting for the hog-calling contest. 

Daisy: It is a little dull, but I don't mind.  (To Bertie) How did we raise a city slicker? Small town life is so much nicer. 

Bertie: Probably because we were living in a city for most of her life.  Of course, she is a grown woman and could go back if she chose, but I don't see her packing.  

Tate: I'm thinking, now that I've got the house in some kind of order, of getting a job here.  Do the rest of it at my own pace, you know?  It's not like I've got anything to go back for. 

Albus: Witch's Cove is always hiring, but it's mostly summer.  What kind of work are you looking for? 

Tate: Well, I've worked lots of janitor type jobs.  Some construction. 

Albus: Joe Montez is a contractor.  I don't know the number, but you can google him.  

Leia: Who is that fine looking slice of man? 

Boudica: Which one? 

*****

The evening winds down.  

Luna Jones relaxes at her face-painting station on the beach, listening to Sarcastic Fringehead perform requests.  One of twins is singing a duet with Whitney, some ancient love song.  Luna hopes Mom or Aunt Gwen picks her up soon - it's gotten chilly since the sun went down. 

 

 

Reopening

Brent and Daisy video chat, both enjoying the summer weather.

Daisy: Oh, she's almost good as new.  We're concerned there might have been damage to her vocal cords from the intubation, but other than that, she's good.

Brent: Other than that?  The girl's a singer!  Damage to her vocal cords could end her singing career!

Daisy: She's also an actress and she's prepared to change her path a bit if needed.  We're just glad she's pulled through.  But I'm calling you about something else.  

Brent: Please don't tell me one of you two are sick now.

Daisy:  No, we're healthy.  Didn't you mention something the other day about a new television station there in Barbieville?  Are they looking for journalists? 

Brent: Kyra's ex has started WDLC.  Have you decided to finally get out of the city?

Daisy: You know we were already dealing with the homophobia and Bertie getting eyed by Immigration every time she turned around.  We almost lost our daughter to the pandemic and now race riots are going on again.  We're just done.

Brent: I can get you William's information, so Bertie can send a resume.  I'll put in a good word for her.  William and I get along much better than I expected.

Daisy:  Do you know any of the other WDLC people?  Any possible problems there?

Brent: The only journalist I know is Becky Weasley.  She walked out of college graduation and into a job at WDLC, but I'm not sure what she'll be doing there.

Daisy: She was the nice KBV girl, right?  Not the psycho? 

************************

So Long, Sister

Much to Brent's relief, Kyra's family gets along well with his sister's.  Now he can feel comfortable in taking things to the next level.  On the last day of the visit, they take in the sights of Washington DC.

Kyra: Make sure you can see the Memorial behind us.  It's not often my girls and I get a vacation.  I want photographic evidence it happened.

Brent: Is this really necessary?  You know I hate having my picture taken. 

Kyra: Surely you don't want me to gripe all the way home?

Bertie:  Oh my god!  Delete that!  I look like I have no neck! 

Daisy: You know that shirt does that and wore it anyway.  Suck it up, Buttercup. 

Bertie: Seriously, Daze, I look ridiculous.

Daisy: Siblings shot!  Me and my bro!

Brent: You know, I just wanted  a picture of the Washington Monument.  

Daisy: As seldom as I get to see you?  Did you really think I wasn't going to insist on pictures? 

Whitney: Wilma, where are your shoes?

Wilma: Brent gots them.  We was sticking my toes in the water so the fishies could nibble them.  It tickles, Mommy, you should do it with me. 

As night falls, they pack up The Tank and prepare for the journey home. 

Daisy: Let me know when you get home safely. I don't care what time it is. 

Wilma: Bye bye, new aunties! 

As soon as her brother is out of sight, Daisy bursts into tears. 

Esper: Here come the waterworks.

Bertie: Behave.  You know how much Brent means to her.  When the rest of the family turned their backs on her, he... 

Esper:... turned his back on them.  (To Daisy)  Hey, think of it this way.  If things go well, we might be going to his wedding soon.  

Daisy: She is a wonderful lady, isn't she? I haven't seen him this happy in, well, ever!

Brent: Wendy, turn the stereo down a notch.  I want Nakoma well rested when it's time to switch drivers. 

Wendy (does so):  I think your sister is very cool.  Your parents must be real jerks.  

Brent: They are. 

Kyra: I really can't imagine disowning my child.  (Winks at Whitney) Even if she did have a baby when she was still one herself.

Whitney: Speaking of Wilma, where is she?

Wilma (shouting from the rear sleeping area): I'm taken a nap with Nakoma.  Them new aunties done weared me out.

Meet The Sister

Somewhere between Barbieville and their destination....

Brent: Next rest area, I'll turn the wheel over to you, Nakoma.  Road's starting to hypnotize me.

Nakoma: Even with Kyra talking to you, you've already driven farther than you should have.  I was about to suggest the switch.

Kyra: We're more than halfway there, according to the GPS on my phone.

Eventually, after what feels like forever....

Nakoma: Here we are, folks.  Juniper Hill Campground and RV Court.  

Kyra: Wilma, get out of the way.  Brent and Nakoma are trying to set up the tent.

Wilma: I'm helping!  Why we got the tent anyway?  Lots of beds inside.

Brent: There's five beds and six of us. I'll take the tent since I'm the only boy.  And mind your grandmother.  

Wilma: Boo.  I wanna be a helper.

Whitney: You can help once this hot dog is in your belly.  

Wilma: Mommy said you gotta hold on real tight while we look for your sissy.  

Brent: I will.  Daisy will be in either a red truck or a dark colored car.  Probably the car, since it's hard to cram three grown ups in a truck cab. 

Wilma: Esper ain't no grown-up.

Brent (chuckles): She's as grown-up as your mommy.  

Wilma: Oh, she's that big?  I thought a kid like me or Wendy.  

Brent: Well, your mommy is technically a kid, you know.

Wilma (nearly jumping out of his arms): Car!  Is that them?  Someone is waving real big and crazy.

Brent: That's them.  

Whitney: I'm here to help you down the ladder, Wilma.  

Wilma: I can do it all by myself, Mommy! 

Whitney: I'm here to catch you if you slip.  Is that better, Miss Fussy Britches?

Brent runs to greet Daisy with a big hug.  

Daisy: Wow.  You brought a whole family of hotties.  

Brent: I told you Kyra and her girls were lovely. 

Daisy: Your taste has always been questionable.  (sticks her tongue out at him)  Even that Naomi girl is pretty.  No, not Naomi.  What is it?

After introductions, the party splits into smaller groups.  

Bertie: Brent says you met when he ran against your boss for mayor? 

Kyra: Technically, she's not my boss, the town is.  But she is my best friend.

Daisy (laughs): Oh, that's not awkward at all.

Brent:  Rose-Grace doesn't hold it against me.  In fact, she was impressed that I didn't make the race personal.  This was her third election and last time two people went up against her. Both ran smear campaigns. 

Daisy: We met at my work.  Bertie stops in every morning for coffee and an apple turnover.

Kyra: Whitney's a waitress, too. 

Daisy: It's a gas station.  Hasn't Brent told you anything about us?

Brent: Not about your professional life.

Daisy (to Brent): You're fired.  This woman doesn't even know she's in presence of celebrities.

Brent: Sorry, I don't think of you in term of your jobs.  (To Kyra) Bertie is the anchor for the local news and Esper has had a few roles in musicals.  

Esper: You guys are dating twins?  Are they identical?

Whitney: Yes, identical twins.  Usually we can tell them apart.  Mine is surlier than hers.

Nakoma: Surlier?  Is that even a word? 

Esper: Most of the guys I know are gay.  That stereotype about theatre guys?  Almost totally true.

Whitney:  You do theatre?

Esper (shouts down to Brent):  You're fired!

After a long visit, everyone decides to give Brent and Kyra some private time.  Bertie and Daisy take the two youngest for a hike.  The older teens join them for a bit, but eventually wander off. 

Wilma: Help! I climb-did up here and now I'm stuck! 

Daisy: You aren't very high up - just drop and I can catch you.

Wendy (annoyed): She does this all the time.  

Bertie: For the love of God, don't drop that baby! 

Wilma (indignant): I'm not a baby!  Babies wear dipes!

That evening, Esper posts a selfie on her social media.  She couldn't post it when she took it because there was no signal out there! 

The Lazy Days of Summer

Leia: Can we ride this?  

Sylvia: Sorry, but no.  The opening of the Windigo has been delayed.  (Surprised, to Zenobia)  Holy cow, is that your little sister?  She's grown.

Zenobia: That's her.  She and Draco are both nearly high school age, can you believe it?

Leia: Draco can't stay in one school long enough to learn anything.  We're in the same grade now. 

After they've gotten their tickets, Zenobia leads Leia toward the gate.

Leia: I'm pretty sure Draco was the jerk commenting on your vlog that only your white friends could be bothered to help you move. 

Zenobia: I don't know who makes me madder, the ones accusing me of racism or the racists defending me.  Besides, Nakoma is an Indian and the Eaton boys are Gypsy.  

Leia: That boy Peeta was really cute.  Is he one of the Eatons?

*****

As they walk away, Nakoma arrives to relieve Sylvia at the ticket counter.  

Nakoma: Anything interesting?

Sylvia: Not much.  Except the boss says not to sit on the counter.

Nakoma: What's she gonna do?  Fire me? 

Sylvia: She'll put you on janitor duty.

Nakoma recoils at the thought and hops down as Sylvia leaves.

Nakoma (teasing): What's this?  You're slacking off while Sylvia does all the work?

John: Taking advantage of a little down time to do some studying.  Sylvia didn't mind.

Nakoma: Me, either.  I'm glad for you - not glad that you made the mistakes that put you in this position, but glad you get the chance to fix them. 

John: It was only one mistake, but she was a huge one.  If it weren't for Roxy and Kelly...

He's interrupted by Pocahontas bringing the lunchbox Nakoma forgot.

Pocahontas: Please don't finish that sentence, John.  

**** 

McG has fled the noise of Lee's home restoration, but her quiet time with a book gets interrupted.

Fred: Grandma, can you find us some ghost videos?  

Kelly: Ghosts are pretend!

Fred: No way, she lives in a ghost house, don't you, Grandma?

Nikki: Have you seen anything, you know, ghostly?  They say renovations can stir spirits up.

McG: Nothing of consequence.  Movement in the edge of my vision, perhaps.

Taylor: Alex's dad is part of a ghost hunter team.  I bet they'd come check it out for you. 

McG: I'll keep that in mind in case our cabinets start opening themselves and spewing their contents.

*******

Brent relaxes after a long day at work by video chatting with his sister and her family.

Brent: Good news.  The Tank is ours for the week, but we are bringing along another driver.  One of Whitney's friends, a real nice girl.  Where's Esper?

Esperanza (stepping into frame): I'm here!  Rehearsal ran over and then I got stuck behind a granny with no gas pedal.

Daisy: Sit down.  We don't want to look up your skirt and neither does Uncle Brent.

Esperanza: Shove over.  The camera range is only so big, you know.

Daisy: Sorry, Brent.  You know how teenagers are.

Brent: Well, she's right.  I can't imagine if we all crammed into view on my end like you suggested.

Bertie (laughing): The little one could sit on your lap.  That only leaves, what, four of you? 

Daisy: Why isn't Whitney's boyfriend driving?  His parents own the thing, right?