Zoe, Chelsea, and Kelly Wardrobe

 WARNING!  NUDE AND CROSSDRESSING PLASTIC CHILDREN AHEAD! 

These are my Kelly/Zoe hybrids.  Wilma, Jenny, Tommy, and Fred.  They are still wearing the Zoe outfit their body donors wore.  (Please see previous blog post for a review of Zoe.)  I finally got around to going through the wardrobe for my brats.

The babies are hoping for hand-me-downs, as their wardrobe is very limited.  (They do get to wear the smaller shirts in the brat wardrobe.)

Mattel outfits.  Made for Chelsea or Kelly.

From various sources, thrift stores and yard sales.

Monster High shirts make dresses for the brats.  Strawberry Shortcake and Lil Bratz are roughly the same size and some clothes can be shared.  I did take in the plunging neckline on one of the dresses.

These were on knock-off princess dolls.  

Some of the clothing in previous pictures will vanish at this point.  Anything in need of serious repair or flat-out hideous.  I didn't even try those on the dolls.

Body mold comparison.  Most of the height difference in in the legs, but there is a bit in the torso.  My Chelsea dolls are awaiting body donors.  My Chelsea dolls have more variety of skin tones and a more natural pose, so I gave the Kelly dolls dibs.

Halloween Costumes!  Fred and Wilma are wearing their original outfits, but he needed britches for modesty.  Wilma looks more like the character she was based on with that shorter skirt.  Jenny's full-length wizard robe now only reaches the knee.  The babies inherit pumpkin, but gingerbread is too big. 

The original group trying on the costumes.  Slight alterations to gingerbread are needed (feet holes). Look for it come Halloween!  Pumpkin can be worn with britches, but loses cuteness, so it goes to the babies, where it is appropriately cute.

As I expected, all the Kelly/Chelsea brand things fit.  Skirts and pants are just shorter.

I only kept three of the princess gowns.  Fred and all the girls had a draft in the back.

You might notice repeat uses of britches.  They were outnumbered by shirts.  Those pink shorts on Jenny might end up in the baby wardrobe - they fit, barely.  Jenny and Fred are wearing open shirts.  The white shirt on Tommy feels sticky/tacky, so it went in the reject pile.  Wilma's holding down the bib on her overall skirt to show the shirt beneath.  Make sure you look at it! Don't make Wilma cry!

Wow, that patchwork dress is short!  Good thing it and Wilma's skirt have a modesty panel! Kept everything here except the white thing on Malachi.  Somebody's drunk grandma made it.

Monster High dresses.

All done modeling and ready to play!  C'mon over!

Smiths Happen

John waits nervously as the music begins.  The day he's wanted for so long is finally here! 

Best Man Sulu and Maid of Honor Midna seem to take forever to march down the aisle and join him at the front.  Mayor Rose-Grace Pike forces herself not to grin when Sulu winks at her. 

Nakoma and Anakin follow suit, although they do move a bit faster.  John suspects Midna and Sulu went so slow just to prolong his torture.

Roxy (whispering): Kelly, ring bearer stands on Daddy's side. 

Kelly: No way! I ain't no boy! 

As the music swells, Pocahontas pauses before making her entrance.

Albus: Take the bouquet and go claim that man for yourself.

Pocahontas: I wish Mom was here. 

Albus: Kida's here.  She's just disguised as an old man. 

Finally, John stands before his bride.  It took way too long to get here.

Rose-Grace: Who gives this woman in marriage? 

Albus: In her mother's stead, I bless this woman's choice to give herself in marriage. 

Instead of removing "obey" from her traditional vows, they add it to his.  Then the kiss, a rather chaste one despite Sulu's previous urging to make it sexy.  

Rose-Grace: It is my honor to introduce, for the first time ever, John and Pocahontas Smith. 

Sulu: I've known John pretty much all my life.  We practically lived at each other's houses from second grade on.  Pocahontas was always there, too.  We were like the Three Musketeers.

Pocahontas: Or the three stooges.

Sulu (pointedly ignoring her, but waits for laughter to subside):  There was, shall we say, a large bump in the road on the way to this day.  There were times I doubted it would happen, I won't lie, but here we are.  John, my brother from another mother, you deserve every bit of the happiness ahead of you.  And all the butt-kicking that girl's served out - past and future.

Midna: I know it's bad form to bring it up, but I went to college with a broken-hearted gal.  She poured herself into her studies, determined to keep her mother's dream alive despite the fact that her own had evaporated.  I was prepared to hate John.  Instead, I became his biggest cheerleader.  Fate has given John and Pocahontas a second chance.  As deeply as they love one another, they'd be fools to let it go.

Pocahontas: Thank you so much, Albus.  Ever since Dad walked out on us, I planned to do the father/daughter dance with Mom.  You're the closest thing I have now. 

Albus: I've never been happier that she cussed me out for trying to warn her about that guy.  

When the time comes for the groom to dance with his mother, John shocks everyone by cajoling Pern into the spotlight.  Her cheeks nearly as pink as her hair, she joins him.

John: My mother passed away a few years ago and I don't have an Albus.  I chose to honor Pernilla today because she's given me quite a precious gift.  We have full legal custody of Pern's son, my brother-in-law Anakin, who has even taken my surname. 

Nakoma (muttering): Don't do it, John.  

Midna: What? 

Roxy: You don't want nobody to know your name is Smith now, too?

Nakoma: Today is about John and my sister, okay?  It isn't about me or my loser father.

John doesn't do it.  Probably because he was warned beforehand.

 

Santa Visits Barbieville!

Courtesy of the museum, Santa photos are free for children under the age of twelve.  He arrived this morning after the parade.

Boudica: Seriously, Mom, can't you get an older lady to play Mrs. Claus?  

Helena: Some children are frightened of Santa and the opposite of old and male....

Guinness and Boudica:  Is young and female.

Helena: Besides, you aren't his wife.  You're one of his elves. 

The Sulu children are first in line.

Vivica: Santa, this is our new baby.  Her name is Dixie.

Santa: And what would Dixie like me to bring her?

Vivica: She likes juice.  Can you bring her juice?

Santa: Of course.  What would you and Bobby like this year?

Bobby: A Switch and PlayStation and Xbox and lots of games and... 

Vivica: Hey! Mommy said no being a greedy butt! (to Santa) But yeah, we've tried to be good so you would bring us a video game system.  

Ty Dean is next.

Ty: My big brother says all of your reindeer are girls.  He says boy reindeers lose their antlers in the winter.  But Rudolph is a boy name, right? 

Santa: Well, now.  Frodo seems to be under the impression they're normal reindeer.  He's mistaken, of course, since normal reindeer cannot fly.  You may tell him that some of my deer are girls and some of them are boys.  

Ty: YES!  Thank you, Santa!  (Runs off without asking for anything.)

Jenny Montez pauses to show Santa her candy-cane dress before the picture is taken.

Jenny: You picked a good helper this year, Santa.  Boudica helps Doctor Marcus take care of my Uncle Billy.  

Santa (exchanging a glance with Boudica): It was very nice of her to help.  My wife and elves are all very busy, you know.  

Jenny: And last year her big sissy helped you, but that silly Zenobia pretended to be an elf.  Why'd she do that for? 

Santa: Today Boudica is an elf.  My helpers always are.

Jenny: What I would like for Christmas is a big-girl bicycle.  Wif training wheels, so Daddy can take them off when I get even bigger.  I have been very good and don't even sass Auntie Charlotte.

Guinness is surprised to see Anakin.  

Kelly: Oh, Santa, look!  This is Anakin and he's gonna be our uncle soon!  His mommy didn't let you come to her house, but now he lives with us and you can bring him goodies, too! 

Santa: Yes, of course I'll bring Anakin goodies.  What would you like, young man? 

Anakin: Nothing for me, sir.  I'm very happy with what I have. 

Kelly: Ask him to help your mommy not get sick no more!  (To Santa) Sometimes Pern takes medicine wrong.  But we don't want her to get dead. 

Roxy: Kelly!  What did Pocahontas tell us about don't tell secrets that can make people cry?

Anakin: That's not what she meant, Roxy.  (winks at "Santa") My mommy's problem isn't a secret, anyway. 

Kelly: Fine then.  You can ask for a car with muscles. 

Anakin: I'm too young for a car, goofball.  (To Santa) We will write to you at the North Pole with our wish lists. C'mon, girls, other kids are waiting!

The three youngest Pike children clamor onto Santa's lap.  Well, two of them - Orlando needs Boudica to soothe him a bit.  

Fred: My big brothers said to ask you for a really big toy box because my toys are taking over our room.  But me and the babies really bad want you to make a baby grow in Silvie's belly.

Santa (shocked): Silvie?  Sylvia Guinness?

Fred (giggling): No, silly.  Silver Stream.  Grandpa Mace's girl horse.

Santa (relieved): I'll see what I can do. 

Santa: Stacie, you didn't want to be in the picture? 

Stacie (leans close and whispers): I know that's you, Mr. Guinness, working for the real Santa.  Don't worry, I won't tell the littles.  Grandpa Mace will handle the horse baby thing.

Guinness: Good to know.  And thank you, Miss Pike.

Anakin: Come on, Stacie, hurry. Our grown-ups are waiting in the lobby.  We're going to the Oriental Buffet!  

Stacie: I love that place!  Sushi is so good! 

Anakin: Yuck.  Raw fish.  What did you say to him, anyway? 

Stacie: Just letting him know his secret's safe with me.  Besides, we know he's gonna report back to the real Santa.

Anakin: Uh, yeah.  No need to upset anyone, right? 

The Home Place

Doll County Day Care, early morning.

Jenny: Oh, boy, new giant dollies!  I love the new center so much!

Fred: And army dudes!

Batgirl: John, I don't think you've met my sister Charlotte.  She's considering your day care for her children.

John: Of course.  Step inside, Mrs. Jackson, and have a look around. 

Charlotte: Why are they all barefoot?

John: You'd be surprised how many germs ride on the soles of your shoes.  Also, it saves injuries if the kids get too rambunctious.

Batgirl (after Charlotte has gone inside): Don't count on her as a client.  She's probably not going to get custody - the judge has already awarded temporary custody to her stepson.  She's just keeping up appearances.

John: Shame.  Your girls were always a delight and if their cousins are anything like them...

Batgirl: Honestly, Joe and I have a better shot at custody than she does.  

John: I didn't know you were trying for custody.

Batgirl: We aren't.

Sylvia: Hi, I'm Miss Sylvia.  Welcome to bedlam.

Charlotte: You work here?  What are your qualifications?

Sylvia: My minor is in Education and I love children.  

Charlotte: And your Major?

Sylvia: Environmental Sciences.  I attend the local university.

Charlotte: What's this?  Surely the children aren't expected to read this?

Sylvia: Guidelines for the parents.  It amazes me how little some of them realize the needs of children.  My personal favorite is number 42.  

Jenny:  Look, Auntie Charlotte!  A astronaut lady doll! 

Charlotte: Be quiet, Jennifer, the adults are talking.

*****

Saturday morning, at the Oriental Buffet.

John: Pocahontas and I narrowed the options down to the houses we're looking at today and we want your opinions, since you'll be living there, too. 

Pocahontas:  If you have misgivings about a place, tell us.  No matter how dumb you might feel it is.  

Anakin: What if Mommy gets permission to have me again?  

Pocahontas: Then you'll have a nice place to visit your sisters.  Trust me, boy, we're still gonna be in your life unless she takes you to Mars.  

Anakin: Or maybe she could come live with all of us! 

Pocahontas (chuckles): I suppose anything is possible.  We're having this conversation, aren't we?  

Roxy: Cause of me and Anakin.

Kelly:  I helped! Dint I help, Nakoma? 

Nakoma: I'm sure you did.  Once we settle on a house, can we start planning a wedding?

John: What do you think?  Me and you could do some male bonding in that garage.

Kelly: I wanna male bondage, too! 

Anakin: Male means boy, you goofball.  Like rebuilding muscle cars together and stuff.

Kelly: Cars don't got muscles.  Daddy, tell him!  Cars got motors!

John (winks at Anakin): Yeah, Anakin, you goofball.  Cars don't got muscles.

Roxy: I like that porch and flowers all around it.

Pocahontas: Yes, but those flower beds take a lot of work to maintain.

Roxy: No problem.  Albus will come do it for us.  He has a nice garden at The Point.

Pocahontas: Albus will have his hands full with his own garden, wherever he ends up.  

Roxy: I still can't believe Batgirl's mean sister is making him move.

Pocahontas: Me, too.  But you know what?  I bet Albus would love to teach you how to garden.  Then, if we decide on this house, that will be your job.

Kelly (crying):  Don't like this house!  It is mean!

Anakin: There at the top of the steps, when you turn the corner toward the bedrooms.  I felt like zombies were gonna bust through the wall and eat me.  

Nakoma: I thought I was imagining things until I saw how you guys were reacting.  Roxy wouldn't even go up the stairs.  But John and Pocahontas didn't notice anything.

Anakin: Kids are more sensitive to stuff like that.  Ghosts or whatever.

Pocahontas: There seems to be a consensus on this house, but it's only three bedrooms.

Nakoma: Are you still on about that?  I told you I'm fine sharing.  But I do think we girls should get that room with the balcony.

Roxy: If we gotta fit three beds in there, shouldn't we take the biggest room?  The blue flowery bedroom is the biggest.

Nakoma: Kelly's is a toddler bed.  We can fit into the balcony room.

Pocahontas: Kelly will outgrow that toddler bed in no time.  Roxy's right.  Besides, I'm calling dibs on the balcony room.  

*****

Ladies' Lounge, Doll County Country Club.

Helena: Lottie Gordon.  I need to have words with you.

Charlotte: My name is not Lottie Gordon, it's Charlotte Jackson. What do you want, Helena?  Going to bully me some more like you did in school? 

Helena: What do you call buying out a major source of revenue for Barbieville and shutting it down?  I'd call that bullying.  

Charlotte:  I don't care.  I came back to rub it in all your faces that I'm not trailer trash anymore, and I'm going to do it.

Helena: No, Lottie, you are still trailer trash.  Money does not buy class. 

Charlotte:  I'll have you know -- 

Helena: I know what I need to know.  You will not put half of Barbieville out of work on my watch. 

Charlotte: You can't stop me.  I can buy and sell you fifty times over.

Helena: You can't buy and sell the entire town if we join forces against you.  And trust me, we will if you keep this up.  

***Reminder to readers: Charlotte's offspring live at Our Toy Story on Facebook.*****