Meetings

 KAP  (Kin As Parents) has its first meeting since the disaster, welcoming new members.

Ken:  We don't know what we're going to do.  Peeta's dad pays his tuition, but with Mom and Bonnie gone and having the care of Tommy as well as Ox, I may have to drop out of college. 

Pocahontas: I'm always hiring, but during the off season... 

Tony:  What's your business?   

Pocahontas:  My sister and I own Witch's Cove.  She graduated with Ken and his husband.  I also have custody of a brother the same age as his Tommy and your Marty.  How is Marty?  Any news about his father?

Tony:  Rayshawn might be one of the John Does found, but they aren't ready for identification.  Marty's doing about as well we should expect.  His mother's flying in tomorrow.  

Nova:  How are you and Luna holding up? 

Gwen:  We're a mess.  Neither of us has even gone into Rallee's room, not even to get her work things for the new superintendent.  Guinness is starting the job without a lot of vital paperwork because I can't...  I don't even know if I should be here.  

Midge:  If you need us, you should be here.  I was totally lost when Kamala fell into my lap. 

Gwen:  Yeah, but I've been as good as her parent Luna's whole life.  That part isn't a big transition for me.  I thought about grief counseling instead of this, but I know you people.  That makes it better somehow. 

Ben:  Maybe we shouldn't tell them.  Seems mean. 

Becky:  Yeah, we should wait.

*****  

At the mayor's office, Rose-Grace discusses the dam sabotage with federal agent Carol Danvers.

Rose-Grace:  What do you mean, this might not be related to Hank Higgins?  You have other people in my town in Witness Protection?  And that PI is snooping around about Cash.

Carol:  To the best of my knowledge, Hank was the only person here with ties to organized crime.  But then I found out about Maisie Barnes's birth family.  What do you know about them? 

Rose-Grace:  Maisie?  Dionne's friend?  She has no contact with her birth family.  Hates all their guts.

Carol:  Possibly with good reason.  I have an even thicker file on them than I do on Hank-used-to-be-Cash.  Maisie isn't even her birth name, she legally changed it when she got married.  Presumably to dodge them and any of their associates. 

Rose-Grace:  Well, if you're investigating her, you shouldn't talk to me about it.  Conflict of interest - Maisie's been practically family since junior high.  

Carol: We'll move on to the seismologist that tipped off the saboteurs. 

Arrest and Arrangements

 

Bertie: News on the Deadly Driver, who has killed two local women and injured another.  Paris Malfoy, husband of one of the victims, was arrested this morning at his home in The Tor.  Malfoy is head of the history department at Doll County Community College.  We take you live to Rebecca Weasley, live at Barbieville City Hall Complex. 

Becky:  I'm here with Barbieville Police Chief Becky Lynch, who made the arrest.  Chief Lynch, what led to this arrest?  What evidence to you have that Professor Malfoy committed the crimes in question? 

Lynch:  The third victim, who survived the attack, was wearing a portable sports camera.  She shared video footage with us that contained compelling information.   We obtained warrants not only for his arrest but for certain technology from the Malfoy home and office, from which we hope to determine a motive.  

Bertie: All reports are that the Malfoy family is cooperating with the investigation.  In other news, two events upcoming this summer promise better times.  A civilian committee is planning a Pride Event for later this month and The Grand Re-Opening of Witch's Cove, which will include a formal ball for some of the guests, is planned for Father's Day.  

****

Speaking of that civilian committee... 

Peeta: Hey, we're wearing the same shirt! 

Albus (chuckles): Great minds think alike. 

Ken: I can't believe nobody wanted to help you with this, Zenobia.  Peeta and I were just talking the other day about how so many get ridiculous for Pride events and all of us look bad.  I mean, that's why the town stopped sponsoring anything. 

Albus: Flaunting the differences only alienates the people we're trying to convince.  If we want to be seen as just like them, we need to behave with the same discretion they do.  

Candy (coming up behind Ken): It's not always about convincing anyone.  Sometimes it's just about embracing who you are.  Love is love, sure, but other people are just promiscuous.  Seriously, Albus, neither you or Zenobia has any intention of ever marrying.

Zenobia: She's got us there, Albus.  Pride's about way more than marriage rights and everyone here knows it.  A lot of the folks who go overboard for Pride aren't asking for acceptance, they're showing that they don't need or want acceptance.  (To Candy) And I told you that your help here might be a problem.  Conflict of interest or something.

Candy: Well, you can just claim my son was coming to tell you Windu Acres is planning to do carriage rides and a horse-baby petting zoo.  I tagged along because I'm getting cabin fever. 

Finnick:  All I know is that if I'm making out with Nakoma and Peeta's holding hands with Ken, people are gonna get offended at them and not us.  It's stupid.  And I did not know you told Mom that, Zenobia, or I wouldn't have brought her.  

Zenobia: Well, if there's a problem, we'll deal with it.  I've got too much stress in my life to create more by worrying.  You and your trouble-making mom are welcome to stay. 

Getting Answers

 Barbieville Police Station

Lynch: You found the body, ran into Shore Thing, and had them call 911. I need a little bit more than that to go on.  Why were you there? What did you see specifically? 

Hank: That's all you're getting until my man from Witness Protection shows up. 

Lynch: Hank, you stumbled upon a crime scene. Giving me a statement about that is not going to have any impact on your status with the feds. You don't need to bother them with this. 

Hank: I don't care if I'm bothering them. (Stands up) Unless you call them in, or arrest me, I'm going back to my office.  I'm a busy man, Chief Lynch. 

Lynch: Fine, I'll call them. We'll make an appointment to get your statement.

Hank completely misses her sarcasm and leaves. Lynch goes back to her paperwork, what little she has at this point, and is startled by the abrupt appearance of Midge Sherwood, county coroner.

Midge: I've brought over copies of all my documents. The autopsy supports the obvious cause of death, unless something really weird shows up in the lab report. 

Lynch: Is it casual day at the morgue? 

Midge (laughs): No, I shower there and put on my civvies before heading home. 

Lynch: Not a bad idea. Sometimes I feel like I never take this uniform off. 

Midge: We might have a problem with Mr. Higgins. He tried to stop the CSI team from taking photos. 

Lynch: You have no idea. I'll handle him. How's Kamala settling in? 

Midge: She hasn't left my house. But it's not like I've had time to show her around town. 

*****

Windu Acres

Tanner: More dogs? 

Mace: I wondered when you were going to ask about that.  They came with the horse, and I know a few people who might adopt them.  Your girlfriend for one. She was disappointed when your folks decided to keep Cujo and Yeti.

Tanner: Yeah, but then Santa brought Anakin a cat. 

Mace: I know some other people, too.  Nakoma just gets first dibs. 

Tanner: I bet Four and Tris will take one, now that they're in their own place. She really misses her parents' dogs. 

 

Mace: Now you're thinking. (changes the subject) We buy the young rejects and breed them. There's less money in it, short term, but that's how we get the strong work horses Windu Acres is famous for.  People will reject a foal for all kinds of reasons.  

Tanner: Yeah, this one's got socks on the left legs but not on the right legs.  Big deal.

Mace: Don't be a snob. Some jobs require a certain look for the horse.  (Mace eyes Tanner for a moment.) You know, I'm really glad you decided to work with me. I retired because neither of Rosie's girls cared to follow in my footsteps.  Then y'all came along, and those foals turned up in the Nature Preserve, and I figured someone up there was telling me something.

Tanner: Did they ever catch the jerk who dumped those three? (Mace shakes his head.) Hagrid needs more trail cams. 

*****

WDOL studios

William: Good Afternoon, ladies. Is there a problem? 

Bertie: Yes. A major one. Have you seen the garbage they expect us to say on the air?

William: I can't say I have.  I trust my people to do their jobs largely unsupervised.

Becky: Good journalism should not be biased, Mr. Darling. I learned that on the high school newspaper.

Bertie: One of the reasons I took the pay cut to take this job was so I didn't have to cater to partisan interests. You promised our coverage would be balanced. 

William: Ladies, you are my anchors. You're the boss down there. 

Becky: So you've got our back when we tell them off? 

William (chuckles): Yes, Miss Weasley, I've got your back. 

Live and Learn

Batgirl is enjoying her lunch break when Charlotte barges into the Employees Only area.

Charlotte: I cannot believe the gall!  They've dragged Billy's brother out of hiding! 

Batgirl: Billy has a brother?

Charlotte: God only knows what he's going to tell the lawyers.  When I was pregnant with Max, he called me the most vile names.  

Batgirl (resigned): Sit down, then, and tell me.  

Charlotte: I never mentioned him because he isn't worth mentioning.  Or wasn't until now. 

Batgirl: Honestly, I don't understand why you don't just let Mary Kate and Max go.  Gabriella's been in touch with them and they seem to be happy. You'll have a better chance at patching things up with them once they're grown. 

Charlotte: Billy's sons and brother have always hated me.  They tried to turn Billy against me and now they're taking my children.

Batgirl: They suspect you married him for his money and that you're only interested in the kids' inheritance.  (heavy sigh)  And you've always had... well, challenges, in connecting with people.  

Charlotte: You don't get it.  These are MY children.  MINE. 

Batgirl: They're people, Charlotte, not possessions.

Charlotte stares at her sister for a long moment before rising and leaving without another word.

On her way out of the grocery, she stops in her tracks when she hears someone call her hated nickname. 

Charlotte (irate): What did you call me?! 

Jeremiah: I didn't call you, Charlotte.  (nervously laughs) You don't recognize me, do you? I'm Jeremiah Russo.  Father of two now, one of which happens to be named Lottie.

Charlotte: You named your child after me?  

Jeremiah: She's actually named after her mom's grandmother.  (to Alex)  Go find Lottie.  I'm sure she's back in frozen foods.  

Charlotte: Oh, this isn't her? 

Jeremiah: This is Alex. 

Alex: You're Gabriella's aunt, right?  Charlotte Jackson?

Charlotte (to Jeremiah): I apologize for shouting at you.  Please understand, I've had a very bad day.

Jeremiah: No problem.  I have the same reaction when people call me Jerry.

*********

Phoebe is taking advantage of the unseasonably warm day.  She's researching the history of Witch's Cove, preparing for the paranormal team's work there, in the park.

Becky: Hey, I was just headed over to City Hall to help you out.   Jeremiah told me I could tag along and do a story on y'all for the university paper. 

Phoebe: I got done with everything I can't take with me.  I'll be glad to go over it with you once I get all my notes in order.  

Becky: History of Doll County?  Anything juicy in here or just a lot of land deeds? 

Phoebe: All the juicy stuff was in the newpaper archives. (stops typing)  About what Sylvia said the other day?  About Ben?  She has no idea what she's talking about.   Her ex was convinced Ben's gay because he has a man bun.  Seriously.  That's his entire basis for the assumption.

Becky: Wow.  Sylvia dodged a bullet when they broke up. 

Phoebe: She dodged a nuke when they broke up.  Anyway, I dated Ben back in the day and I can attest to his heterosexuality.  So if you are interested in him, go for it.  

Becky: Really?  You and Ben? 

Phoebe: We just didn't work out.  Not much to tell.  

****

Note to readers: Charlotte's children (Mary Kate and Max) live on Facebook page "Our Toy Story" under the album "Nearly Famous". 

The New Year Brings Beginnings

At the local college, the winter quarter begins.  

Becky: Hey, study buddies.  Ready to start the new quarter?

Phoebe: Sylvia started hers this morning.  Crazy woman took an eight o'clock class. 

Sylvia:  It's a required class, you bonehead.  (To Becky)  How do you know Ben, anyway?  We thought you were another business major, but he said you're in journalism. 

Becky: We're in a support group together, Kin As Parents.  We'd met before that, but KAP was what really made us friends.  

Phoebe: Are you interested in being more than friends?  It's just us girls, you can tell us.

Sylvia: I hope not, because he's gay.  That's why -- 

Phoebe: Stop believing the crap your ex told you.  (To Becky) My sister recently escaped from a cult.  Oops, I mean a bad relationship that might as well have been one. 

Sylvia: Well, if he isn't gay, then why -- (Shuts up when she sees Ben enter the room.)

Ben (laughs at the awkward silence): Talking about me, huh?  Did you have anything juicy to say? 

Becky: You are pretty much the only thing we have in common at this point. 

Ben: Good point.  Besides, if you're talking about me, you're leaving someone else alone. 

Morgan: Welcome to Intro To Paleontology.  I'm Morgan Pike, your instructor.  Today we're just going to go over the syllabus and set some ground rules.

******

At Barbieville City Hall Complex, Rayshawn Lucas puts the next step of his plan into motion.

Rayshawn: Wow.  This is the most casual mayor's office I've ever been in. 

Rose-Grace:  I'll take that as a compliment.  Mr. Lucas, I presume? 

Rayshawn: Yes.  And you must be Ms Pike.  I wanted to discuss my plans for The Point.  Right now, there's an issue with the zoning? 

Rose-Grace: The previous owner was trying to have it rezoned and many of my citizens were against the move.  If you're planning to reopen the motel and campground as it was, zoning won't be a problem. 

Rayshawn: Excellent.  

*****

Jeremiah Russo is moving into his fiancee's rambling old farmhouse, which requires cleaning out unused rooms for his daughters.  Some of his co-workers volunteer to help after work Saturday.

Esmeralda: You're right.  She does look more like a Gypsy fortune-teller than I do.

Jeremiah: It's those earrings.  You don't do the big hoop earrings.

Esmeralda: I never did.  Anyway, put me to work! 

Nova: Neither of these women is Pern.

Jeremiah: Pern's coming.  (Points out his co-workers)  The gal with blue hair is Zenobia Malfoy and the other is Esmeralda Eaton. 

Nova: Zenobia's a Malfoy? Mariko never mentioned that part. 

Jeremiah: He's nothing like her dad, I promise.  How could she be, if she's friends with this bunch? 

Nova: Speaking of this bunch... you can probably guess who they are.  

Jeremiah: How do you tell the twins apart?

Zenobia: Someone got up to some kinky stuff in here.

Nakoma: You got kinky on the brain. When did Esmeralda and Pern switch bodies?

Zenobia: Hey, she volunteered.  Pern had to wait around for Frodo... he got a flat tire and was running late... but she's coming. She said Anakin asked Pocahontas to adopt him?  What's up with that? Your little brother will be your nephew.  

Nakoma: If Pern signs over total custody, it's about the same thing without an actual adoption.  He can even change his name to Smith if they want, but he won't legally be John and Pocahontas's kid. (shakes her head) Kind of hard to explain.  But if they do it, I'm considering asking to do the same, because I'm sick of carrying around Cash's name. 

Tanner: Hey, where's your lazy sons?  Get em in here!

Esmeralda: Only one of my sons is lazy.  

Recover, Register, Relapse

On one of the rare days that both Zenobia and Tris are off work, Tris finds her stressing in the studio.

Tris: What's wrong? 

Zenobia: I've lined up guests for the Openly Biased series on bullying, but can't figure out how to get them all within camera range.  There's too many for swapping them out and I want them to be able to interact.

Tris: I keep telling you, put this wardrobe in front of the extra bathroom door.  If you open it, you'll double the seating area. 

Zenobia: I don't want my viewers looking at this!  I've had it since I was six and it looks like it!  The back lining... well, look at it.

Tris:  We'll go see Joe Montez.  I bet he's got discarded wallpaper we can recover the interior with.  Something not so juvenile and less distracting for your audience.  Buy Four dinner and he'll even do the work for you.

Zenobia: I suppose it's worth a try.  And we'll need Four either way because this thing weighs a ton. 

Later.

Zenobia: Four, I've got your payment ready.  Lasagna and garlic bread, as requested. 

Tris: But first we show you the results.  

Four: We didn't change much on the front.  Covered the logo on bottom so you don't get hit with a copyright violation, but the rest is the same.

Four: But when you open it up, it looks fun but not juvenile. I'm especially partial to the Route 66 sign on the door. 

Tris: What do you think, Zen?  Acceptable?

Zenobia: Even better.  I love it.  I swear, Tris, someone up there blessed me when we met.

Tris: They blessed me just as much.

Four: Oh, get a room, you two.

*****

At the college, Early registration for the Winter Quarter has opened.  Surprisingly few students take advantage of it, but the Barbieville residents do.  The guidance counselor at Barbieville High trained them well.

Phoebe: You look like you just survived a tornado.  

Sylvia: I put the top down.  It feels like summer out there! 

Phoebe: If you've got a science elective, take Intro to Paleontology.  The two o'clock class, so we can ride together. 

Ben: I'm taking that, too.  Just as a random elective, to fill a gap in the schedule. 

Becky: Pike?  Is this instructor kin to your boss?

Ben: His sister.  I haven't met her, though, except in passing.

Phoebe: Hi, Ben's friend that we've never been introduced to even though we see you with him all the time.

Ben: Sorry.  Becky Weasley, these two troublemakers are Phoebe and Sylvia Guinness.  I graduated with them.  

Sylvia: We should all take this class together, even if it doesn't fit our major.  Do you need an elective, Becky? 

Becky: I don't need one, but why not?  We've got a built-in study group right here!

******

Pocahontas comes in after a very long day - John and the kids are already in bed.

Pocahontas:  I'm so glad today is over with.  If it could go wrong, it did.

John: Everything all right now?

Pocahontas: Once I helped Albus get rid of that Jackson woman.  She kept harassing him to drop the charges against Draco Malfoy and he had to call me in because I actually own the property the trailer is on.  She refused to leave until I started dialing the police.  I swear, if one more thing...  (her phone rings)

Pocahontas: Yes, this is her.  What's happened?  (Gives John an alarmed look)  She's safe for the night?  All right, I'll contact you in the morning and we'll make a plan.  (Hangs up the phone and sits in troubled silence)

John: What is it?  Who is it? 

Pocahontas: Anakin's mother.  She's relapsed and overdosed. (Crying)  That poor boy has been through so much, John, why can't he catch a break? 

John: He has caught a break, sweetheart.  He's got us.

Mother's Day Weekend

Friday, before dawn, at Witch's Cove Campground.

Lorina: Stop trying to talk me into staying longer.  I want to spend Mother's Day with my daughter and grandson.  

Albus (making puppy-dog eyes): Well, if you must...  

Lorina (laughing): I must.  It's been fun, Albus, but all good things must end. 

Albus: Bummer, right? 

******

Friday,early evening, at The Overlook.

Jason: I'm sorry I didn't have time to take you home, kiddo.  But I'm sure Pocahontas won't mind if you explore the beach down there.  

Moana: I'll be the best dressed beachcomber this town has ever seen.  

Jason:  Sorry if I'm late.  We went to the graveyard so Moana could put some flowers on her mom's grave and got caught in traffic on the way back.  It is okay for her to go down there, right?

Pocahontas: That's what those steps are for.  I was just telling the others that this month's flowers had a Mother's Day card in it.  I'm not even ten years older than Nakoma! 

Jason: Maybe he knows you've generously given them maternal care even though they aren't your children.  I'd hate to think this guys doesn't know you're their sister if he's courting you.

Pocahontas:  Courting me?  I guess that term works as well as any, if a little dated.  

Nova: Mariko and I are going to do an on-line chat with her mom, and then we're taking mine out to lunch.  What do you guys have planned?

Becky:  Nothing.  The kids are totally bummed - this is their first year without theirs, and my parents expect us to fly across the country just for the day.  With Ron and Ginny's money, you know. 

Ben: Claudia wants to go see our mom, but the prison doesn't have visiting hours on Sunday, so we're going tomorrow. I'd just as soon not do it, but the social worker says I need to let Claudia work things out for herself. 

Nova:  Wait, your parents are in jail? 

Ben: Just mom.  Dad is in the cemetery.  I don't want to talk about it. 

******

Sunday morning, the Pike house.

Rose-Grace:  This might be the most unusual breakfast in bed I've ever seen. 

Fred: Taylor said you'd want boring ole bacon and eggs and I said no way.  Step Mommy likes pizza!

Taylor: He was... um... quite insistent.  

Rose-Grace:  Well, he isn't wrong.  I do like pizza, bear claws, and cappachino.  

Fred: Now eat up!  We got lots of fun on the Jenda for today! 

Rose-Grace:  I hope you aren't forgetting Candy.  She did give birth to half of you.

Tanner: She's still on assignment.  We'll have a belated one for her when she gets back.  

Fred: She likes raw fishies, so we can take her to the ornamental buffet.