Almost Back To Normal

Taylor and Gabriella take Jenny and Fred to the beach.  It's not very hot out, so there aren't any crowds to worry about.

Fred: Look, it's Four and his mommy and brothers and Tris!  Kin we go say hi?

Taylor: Go on.  Remember the Germ Rules.

Four: Are the twins with you? 

Taylor: No, they're at work.  Painting social distancing reminders on the pavement.  Things like horseshoes in the merry-go-round line. Albus said if they gotta do it, they're gonna have fun with it. 

Esmeralda: I was just sending the boys up to the vending machines.  Would you like something?

Jenny: Do they gots candy bars?

Esmeralda: I already have some of those in my cooler bag.  We're out of drinks, though.

Taylor: Who was that with Kevin? 

Four: Ricky.  Or, as he prefers nowadays, Cedric. Mom told him he has to act the part if he wants to use an adult name.  Whenever he gets whiny, we just revert to calling him Ricky. 

Esmeralda: It's done wonders for his attitude.  

Gabriella: But his name's Richard, isn't it?

Esmeralda:  He didn't want to end up being Dick Eaton, for obvious reasons. Cedric is his middle name.

Taylor: I didn't even recognize him.

Four: My dad and your mom have had both families on lockdown.  You haven't seen him in months.  And, you know, puberty.

Tris: By the way, we talked to Rose-Grace about our wedding.  She said all the law requires is a public declaration of intent and signing the paperwork.  Saves us a lot of drama! 

Four: We're going so untraditional, it ain't even funny. 

Gabriella: Hey, it's your wedding. 

******

Hagrid, the caretaker of Doll County Wilderness Preserve, meets with Animal Control and the vet. 

James: How long have they been out here? 

Hagrid: Can't be more than 24 hours.  They weren't here yesterday.

Charlie: This is a new one on me.  Dogs, cats... but horses?  Why would anyone dump horses out here? 

Hagrid: Same reason they do any other critter.  They're disgusting, selfish idiots.

Charlie: Well, I can't take them to the animal shelter.  (to James)  And yours is a mobile clinic.  But I really don't think it's safe for them to stay here.

James: This is even weirder than you think.  They're perfectly healthy, from what I can tell, and look to be purebreds.  Very valuable animals.  

Hagrid (taking out his phone): I might have a foster home for them.  Let me make a call.

Charlie and James exchange a glance, both willing to bet they know who he's calling.

Mace: I see you managed to contain them.

Hagrid: The filly came along nicely, but those two colts... you gotta watch them.  That spotted one just likes to tease, running away and coming back like a boomerang.

Mace: Angus will be glad for the company.  He misses Silverstream. 

Hagrid: Dr. Potter said he'll be by your place tomorrow to give them a real exam.  You sure you're okay with baby-sitting them? 

Mace: I'm okay with adopting them if it comes to that.  I've  finally got grandkids that are interested in following in my footsteps!   

******

Albus meets with the mayor about Witch's Cove reopening.

Rose-Grace: All these measures look good, but why is she putting off opening until next year?

Albus: To quote her, the place is gonna be a hotbed of germs no matter how many changes we make.  This gives the experts time to cope and it won't break her bank.  Dent it real good, but not break it.  I doubt even Kida realized how well-off she left her girls. 

Rose-Grace: She told me once that she was probably a millionaire. 

Albus: I wouldn't be surprised.  She made money hand over fist and lived simple. 

Rose-Grace: What about the ghost hunt?  Is that still on?

Albus: Oh, yeah.  They're gonna release a joint DVD.  Good press and a bit of profit for both the park and the paranormal team. 

Smiths Happen

John waits nervously as the music begins.  The day he's wanted for so long is finally here! 

Best Man Sulu and Maid of Honor Midna seem to take forever to march down the aisle and join him at the front.  Mayor Rose-Grace Pike forces herself not to grin when Sulu winks at her. 

Nakoma and Anakin follow suit, although they do move a bit faster.  John suspects Midna and Sulu went so slow just to prolong his torture.

Roxy (whispering): Kelly, ring bearer stands on Daddy's side. 

Kelly: No way! I ain't no boy! 

As the music swells, Pocahontas pauses before making her entrance.

Albus: Take the bouquet and go claim that man for yourself.

Pocahontas: I wish Mom was here. 

Albus: Kida's here.  She's just disguised as an old man. 

Finally, John stands before his bride.  It took way too long to get here.

Rose-Grace: Who gives this woman in marriage? 

Albus: In her mother's stead, I bless this woman's choice to give herself in marriage. 

Instead of removing "obey" from her traditional vows, they add it to his.  Then the kiss, a rather chaste one despite Sulu's previous urging to make it sexy.  

Rose-Grace: It is my honor to introduce, for the first time ever, John and Pocahontas Smith. 

Sulu: I've known John pretty much all my life.  We practically lived at each other's houses from second grade on.  Pocahontas was always there, too.  We were like the Three Musketeers.

Pocahontas: Or the three stooges.

Sulu (pointedly ignoring her, but waits for laughter to subside):  There was, shall we say, a large bump in the road on the way to this day.  There were times I doubted it would happen, I won't lie, but here we are.  John, my brother from another mother, you deserve every bit of the happiness ahead of you.  And all the butt-kicking that girl's served out - past and future.

Midna: I know it's bad form to bring it up, but I went to college with a broken-hearted gal.  She poured herself into her studies, determined to keep her mother's dream alive despite the fact that her own had evaporated.  I was prepared to hate John.  Instead, I became his biggest cheerleader.  Fate has given John and Pocahontas a second chance.  As deeply as they love one another, they'd be fools to let it go.

Pocahontas: Thank you so much, Albus.  Ever since Dad walked out on us, I planned to do the father/daughter dance with Mom.  You're the closest thing I have now. 

Albus: I've never been happier that she cussed me out for trying to warn her about that guy.  

When the time comes for the groom to dance with his mother, John shocks everyone by cajoling Pern into the spotlight.  Her cheeks nearly as pink as her hair, she joins him.

John: My mother passed away a few years ago and I don't have an Albus.  I chose to honor Pernilla today because she's given me quite a precious gift.  We have full legal custody of Pern's son, my brother-in-law Anakin, who has even taken my surname. 

Nakoma (muttering): Don't do it, John.  

Midna: What? 

Roxy: You don't want nobody to know your name is Smith now, too?

Nakoma: Today is about John and my sister, okay?  It isn't about me or my loser father.

John doesn't do it.  Probably because he was warned beforehand.

 

The Mouths of Babes

Zenobia:  Welcome to Openly Biased.  Doll County is reopening, but we aren't talking pandemic today.  A larger matter needs our attention.  What's larger than a pandemic?  My guests are the Dean brothers, Frodo and Ty, and the Pike brothers, Tanner and Freddy.  They can explain better than I can.

Frodo: We big brothers have agreed to let Ty and Fred take the lead on this.

Ty: We was both very sad and mad about all the bad stuff people are doing.  Our grownups tried to explain, but we're just little kids.  We don't get it.  

Freddy: So we did a spearmint.  These guys took us to the big mall and traded little brothers.  Frodo walked around all day with me and Tanner did it with Ty.  It was lots of fun.

Ty: Let's trade big brothers like we did then!  (The boys switch laps.)  Tanner took me to a movie and then we got ice cream.  Frodo and Freddy had a big ole pizza and then watched a different movie.

Fred: People asked me like ten bazillion times was I okay and did I know Frodo.  Did he steal me or was he hurting me.  Frodo said it was part of the spearmint.

Ty: Nobody asked me that stuff.  And the big boys said that was the spearmint.  All them people thought Frodo was a bad guy, but not Tanner, and the only difference was what color they were.  So then we found out that even the nice people can be dummies about skin color.

Zenobia: It used to be perfectly normal to own black people.  They were livestock, like horses or cows. 

Ty: Frodo said it's like when you throw a rock in the lake.  Owning black people was the big splash, but then all them little waves happen.  Stuff like when you think the best way is being white and going to church and even being a boy instead of a girl.  That's the waves.

Fred: More like the rock was the moon and the splash made tsunamis!  People think the waves are zag-rated or pretend but they aren't.   I don't want Ty to get dead because he's browner than me.

Ty: Lets show them Grandpa Mace's sign.

 

Fred drags a huge poster board into camera range.

Fred: Red is Jenny, Yellow is Vivica, Black is Ty, and White is me.  We're all friends. 

Zenobia: There are different kinds of each color, too, if you think about it.  Just calling Nakoma and Joe "Indians" ignores the fact that they're different tribes.

Ty:  You're not sposed to say Indian.  You're sposed to say Native American.

Zenobia: You're right.  Nowadays some people get upset about the terms we use.  You boys have been saying black this whole time when you should be saying African-American. 

Ty and Freddy (giggling): Busted!  

Zenobia (to camera): The message is clear here.  We've come a long way, but there is still work to be done.  We all need to work on this, no matter where our ancestors came from.  Barbieville was founded as a haven from racism, but even here, it happens.  

Reopening

Brent and Daisy video chat, both enjoying the summer weather.

Daisy: Oh, she's almost good as new.  We're concerned there might have been damage to her vocal cords from the intubation, but other than that, she's good.

Brent: Other than that?  The girl's a singer!  Damage to her vocal cords could end her singing career!

Daisy: She's also an actress and she's prepared to change her path a bit if needed.  We're just glad she's pulled through.  But I'm calling you about something else.  

Brent: Please don't tell me one of you two are sick now.

Daisy:  No, we're healthy.  Didn't you mention something the other day about a new television station there in Barbieville?  Are they looking for journalists? 

Brent: Kyra's ex has started WDLC.  Have you decided to finally get out of the city?

Daisy: You know we were already dealing with the homophobia and Bertie getting eyed by Immigration every time she turned around.  We almost lost our daughter to the pandemic and now race riots are going on again.  We're just done.

Brent: I can get you William's information, so Bertie can send a resume.  I'll put in a good word for her.  William and I get along much better than I expected.

Daisy:  Do you know any of the other WDLC people?  Any possible problems there?

Brent: The only journalist I know is Becky Weasley.  She walked out of college graduation and into a job at WDLC, but I'm not sure what she'll be doing there.

Daisy: She was the nice KBV girl, right?  Not the psycho? 

************************

Friendships Face The Future

The Pike twins and their sweethearts do a conference call.  

Tanner: Are you in Grandpa Mace's room, Whitney?  He's got the same ugly wall. 

Finnick:  That's how lame you are.  Your girlfriend would rather hang with your grandpa. 

Whitney: I'm in the laundry room.  Was gonna use the kitchen table, but Wendy is distracting Wilma in there.  Teaching her to make cookies.  (Changing the subject)  Get a load of this.  My dad wants me to major in mass media and work for him. 

Nakoma:  After his Wilma attitude?  I hope you told him where to stick his cameras and printing press.

Tanner: Hey, now.  He kind of apologized for that. 

Whitney: Only kind of.  But I did tell him I'd think about it.  I wasn't even going to go to college but then I got that scholarship.  Right now I'm majoring in Undecided and getting all the basic stuff done.

Finnick:  Albus got us enrolled for trade school even before graduation.  He's more excited about it than we are.  Said he was beginnning to think he'd have to live forever to keep the rides going.  

Nakoma: Did you hear Four and Tris are already planning a wedding?  The ink's barely dry on our diplomas!  Neither of them is going to college or anything! 

Tanner: He's got a job lined up.  Doing tattoos.  And Tris says flipping burgers is a step up from anything her parents expected her to do.  They'll be all right.  

Nakoma: Oh, yeah, I forgot he apprenticed with his uncle. 

Finnick: His grandpa.  But yeah, they're good to go.  Us?  We got a few years before any serious planning should begin.  All four of us, right, Tanner? 

Tanner: We could talk in general.  Vague stuff.  Like, maybe we should have a double wedding? 

*****

Taylor is out on the deck, getting the gossip from Gabriella.

Gabriella: I may not make it to high school.  Might murder my aunt before then. 

Taylor: Oh, lord.  What's Charlotte doing now?

Gabriella: Well, you know Alex has been wanting to dye her hair since her dad started dating Nova, but her mom had a cow?  She got her mom to promise that if she got straight As all through middle school, she could do anything she wanted with her hair. She got a green mohawk. 

Taylor:  I saw the selfie.  It looks really cute.  But what's that got to do with Aunt Hagface? 

Gabriella: She straight-up forbade me to do anything like that.  In front of my parents. 

Taylor: Did your dad scalp her?

Gabriella (laughing):  I don't think Navajos scalp people, you racist.  

Taylor: Did someone at least slap her?  Cuss her out?

Gabriella: I don't even know.  I came up to our room.  Stayed here until Charlotte left and then I got a lecture about being rude to an adult. 

Taylor: She was rude to you and to your parents.  But you got in trouble. 

Gabriella: Just the lecture, which I've heard about ten million times since she came to town.  Dad did tell me that it's my hair, to do with as I please, but he'd prefer that I keep it the natural color.  (Changing the subject)  I decided to take the college prep courses.  And not just because you are.

Taylor: I told you, it'll be easier than not taking them and then deciding you want to go to college.  

Gabriella: That, and Mom found one of those free on-line courses about the Navajo.  It's really interesting and it blows my mind how little Dad knows of his own heritage.  

****

Nikki is doing the same, but in her room and on a laptop.  

Claudia: I see my little buddy there behind you. 

Nikki: My turn with the babies.  Everyone else is watching some chainsaw murder marathon.  Gross. 

Claudia: Says the zombie show addict.  (Laughs)  Grandma's finally convinced Ben to let me come home on Sunday.  We've been butting heads even worse than normal.

Nikki:  Well, yeah.  She's 500 years old and you've been stuck with her forever. 

Claudia: 500 years old I can deal with.  She's got some really amazing stories.  But the woman is a hermit, Nikki, and she wants me to be a hermit, too! 

Nikki:  I wish you could've stayed here but we already had too many people here.  It never felt like it before, because we're hardly ever all at home, but now it gets really crowded around here.  

Claudia: I'm jealous.  But I'll be home next week, where I can at least wave at people through the window.  I'd be willing to hang with that crybaby Ricky Eaton right now.  

Nikki: Oh, lord, you must be desperate. 

Let The Carnage Begin

WARNING: DOLL CARNAGE AND NUDITY AHEAD

TURN BACK NOW OR SHUT YOUR PIEHOLE

I've had my eye on these gals for a while.  For the articulation, frankly, but more on that in a bit.  This is my COVID-19 splurge.  The rest is going to bills, I swear!  Okay, most of the rest...

The single pack Comfy Princesses do not have knees.  Not even click knees.  So I had to buy the double packs, which gave me a couple of extra gals.  

Most Disney Princess dolls suffer from a severe case of Vapid Face, so my intent from the start was to do some head-swapping.  I bought three princesses of color for the best match to Nikki, Courtney, and Gabriella.  I hoped the extras would match Wendy and Alex.  

Skin tone match isn't perfect, since the noggins are Mattel and the bodies are Hasbro, but I can work with it.

Here Nikki and her body donor compare how well they can hold a phone.  Neither can put it to her face, but at least Tiana can FaceTime.  Whoever Nikki is talking to is looking over there!

Nikki only has click knees, which is an improvement over no knees at all.  But only a slight one.

No, this isn't cannibalism.  

Boiling water softens the heads so they can be easily removed and minimizes the chances of neck pegs breakage.  We don't want the pegs stuck in there because then the new peg might be too big.  Wendy and Alex were already off their bodies.

I'm not so nice to the noggins I don't plan to keep.  This way the neck pegs are intact and not even bent.  You'll notice only four heads when I said I was rebodying five gals.  The Alex head didn't match any of the skin tones at all.

So I'm just going to recast her with one of these two.  Comparing them to Alex's father and sister, Aurora seems to fit in best.  (I guess my dark-haired Alex is gonna get a makeover.)  Not sure yet who Rapunzel will end up being.    

UPDATE: Alex will be the fashionista with the green mohawk on whichever body matches best.  There was an issue with my delivery and Amazon gave me a credit on my account, as an apology.  I chose to get a different noggin for Alex!  Neither of these big-eyed blondes were Alex for me. 

And here they are!  

Wendy Darling, Courtney Montez, Gabriella Montez, and Nikki Pike 

Debuting working elbows and improved knees!

They do have a slight case of bobble-head but that's all right.  

Jeremiah, the younger Eaton boys, and most of the children are jealous.  

They don't even have click knees.

That will be my next project.

Graduation

Every other parking space in the Barbieville Schools lot has a car in it.  Families are gathered in, on, and around each car.  At least one member of each family is wearing the teal or purple graduation gown.   

Rose-Grace: Welcome, everyone, to possibly the strangest graduation in Barbieville history.  Please remember to stay in your designated parking spaces, just as you would your seats at a normal graduation.  Let's also take a moment to be grateful for the lovely weather today.  (Scattering of applause from the families.)  Each of our graduating seniors has overcome unique struggles to be here today, celebrating with us, but we can't let everyone make a speech.  I give you our valedictorian, Whitney Darling, and salutatorian Edward Dean Junior.  

Whitney: Unlike many of my peers, I didn't grow up in this school system.  Coming to Barbieville Schools was a revelation for me - this is a place where education is valued above all else.  Barbieville does have to meet governmental standards, but they don't do it through rote memorization as my previous school did.  My critical thinking skills were challenged here, often, and the faces in the history books became people to me.  I don't think I've met a student who didn't feel valued by the faculty here.  There's a lot wrong with the world, but I'm confident that everyone taking home a diploma today is prepared to make it a better place.

Frodo's cap blows off in the wind.  He sets it on the table before him, on top of the stack of diplomas, before addressing the crowd.  

Frodo: I came up in the Barbieville system, so the stories I hear about public schools seem like science fiction to me.  Some of that dystopian stuff.  Not to say we're perfect, but we pretty much are. (laughter and applause from crowd)  We all have hopes and dreams, and not all of us will succeed in reaching them, but that's okay.  We're human and that happens.  The important thing is that we are prepared to make the attempt.  Look out, world, Barbieville class of 2020 is coming for you!

The graduates are called to the stage one at a time, where they pick up their diploma from the stack.  The mayor bows slightly to them to acknowledge their achievement.  Since this happens in alphabetical order, it's easy for Finnick Pike to rush back onstage when his twin comes out and they hug the mayor. 

Rose-Grace (laughing but annoyed):  Boys!  I told you not to do that!  We have to set an example! 

Finnick (into the microphone):  She's our stepmom, y'all.  We live in the same house.

****

After.

Fred: Kin I see your no-more-school paper? 

Tanner: It's called a diploma, and we still have school to do.  Trade school or college, so we can get good paying jobs and spoil our little brother.  

Fred: But you know how to trade.  You traded me toast for an egg this morning.

Tanner: Trade means job in this case.  We're going to learn how to build and fix machines, like the Windigo.  My ugly brother wants to marry into the amusement park industry, ya know. 

Finnick: I'm still bummed over no prom.  

Tanner (scoffs): Prom.  Maybe you're my ugly sister. 

The extended family makes a conference call to celebrate with the twins.  

Morgan: Candy, you are looking buff.  We're gonna have to start working out together when you're in town.  

Candy: That would be great.  

Pike: Hey, we're supposed to be here for the boys, not a hen party. 

Morgan: Well, the boys aren't here yet.  Should we just sit here and stare at each other until they show up?  (To Candy)  Do you feel old yet?  With your babies graduating?

Candy: Nah, we started young.  I'll feel old when it's Fred up there. 

Pike: I felt old as hell watching them graduate.  I just wish they could've had the giant party they wanted.  It would've been nice to sit with my family, too, but I managed to nab a spot near them.  

Lee: It'll be a funny story to tell their grandkids someday.  Better than getting shipped off to war for your senior trip.  

McG: I'm calling on the land line to find out what's keeping them.  (The boys log in as she rises.) 

****

Whitney's been getting calls all day from unfamiliar numbers.  Distant relatives, mostly, but one in particular stands out.

William: I bet I'm the last person you want to see, but I had to call.  Valedictorian!  That's a big deal even without...  

Whitney (a note of warning in her tone): Without also being a working mom? 

William: I've never been happier to be proven wrong, Whitney.  I won't keep you long, I'm sure you're busy, but I wanted to tell you that.  

Whitney: Wow.  Thanks, Dad.

****

Zenobia sneaks into the break room even though she is still on the clock.

Tris (annoyed): Stop checking up on me.  I'm fine.

Zenobia: Your parents didn't show up for your graduation.  How can you be fine? 

Tris: The only parents I need were there.  Marcus and Esmeralda.  (takes Zenobia's hand)  Honestly, I swear, I'm good.  And I will let you know if I stupidly start missing those xenophobic Bible-thumping losers. 

Zenobia (not really convinced): Okay.  Did you get the text from Midna about when we reopen Sunburst?  

Tris: Yes.  Now get back to work and let me eat in peace.